New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
