Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
