did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
He has the fingertips of a God
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