Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Randomize