You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
