eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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