That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
