I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
