Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize