Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
