So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
