Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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