I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
