Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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