I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
