Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize