Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
