We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Randomize
