I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
