Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Did I show you my penis last night?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
