I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I party with great urgency now.
tell me about the eggs
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
