I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Randomize
