Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
