Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Less talking, more tequila
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
