North Korea, Best Korea!
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
so much tequila, so little girl.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
