He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
