okay pat passed out under dana's car
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
