What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
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