Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
