TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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