apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
