Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
