we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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