I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I had to cum in my sink.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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