I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
