Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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