Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
