Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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