Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
