I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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