so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
My vagina is very pro this idea
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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