If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
