My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
