I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize