I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I just want to make out with him forever
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Randomize
