oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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