so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Randomize
