"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
