Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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