garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
