You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize